There are goal setting dangers that most women are not aware of. Goal setting drawbacks are those that many have when trying to achieve success. If you have been struck by this, then my book is out there to help remedy the situation.
One has to be guided in order to complete the circle of obtaining goals. Here is a look at what is required in order to make these dreams come true:
- Motivation – If there is a lack of motivation in your life, then this may be the root cause as to why you are not setting your goals. Your goals must be attainable. But remember, even though they are attainable, you will face many obstacles in getting to the top.
- Dreams – Dreams are not just something that appear in our sleep; they are the prizes that we want the most in life. It doesn’t matter if your dreams are visiting an exotic island or buying a new car as long as they are a conscious awareness of reality.
- Passion – This is why most women fail when they are setting goals. Many do not possess any kind of passion. Passion is the love for those dreams and moving forward to get them. If there is no passion, then there are no real dreams.
This guide is only the beginning of achieving one’s goals. The burnout from goal setting is very high as goals are often not met instantly. Please remember that there are a few things that one must realize while doing this:
- Routine – Continue following your daily routine. Just because you are trying to attain goals doesn’t mean you stop your daily schedule.
- Hope – Always keep hope in the back of your mind. You won’t lose it if you don’t have it. It’s important to hold on to it.
My book, “Goal Setting Myths and Traps that Hold Women Back: How to Move Past Your Limiting Beliefs and Achieve Your Potential” is designed to keep you motivated while enjoying life to its fullest.
As a first year Ph.D student, I am a very busy woman. Nevertheless, I managed to publish 3 books this year. People ask me, – “how did you find time to do that this year when you are already so busy?”
Regardless of what your goals are – I can’t underscore the following point –
The most important ingredient to achieving your big goals is not will power.
Don’t get me wrong, of course there was lots of hard work involved in the planning, writing and publishing of my books.
What’s more important though, is discovering what your passion is. The secret is to get in touch with your life purpose. My personal experience and research have taught me that once you know what excites you and interests you, then you can begin clarifying what you want to write about.
If you can’t identify what your passions are, be sure to try my free online goal setting program to brainstorm your interests, and to prioritize which interests are most important to you.
In a nutshell, I was able to publish three books in one year, simply because I know what I’m passionate about, and I have a clear vision of what I’m trying to achieve with my life purpose. Indeed, this is an over-simplified answer, but it’s the most important element to being able to accomplish your writing goals, or any other goal for that matter.
Without passion, there is little to no energy and enthusiasm. If you have big goals for yourself, you’ll need a lot of energy and excitement to make it happen. When you’re full of zeal and high off the prospects of what you hope to offer the world, you won’t think of the accomplishment of your goals as something that has required tons of will power.
Despite being a full-time Ph.D student and having many tasks on my plate, I am able to accomplish so much with my writing because it’s always in the forefront of my mind. Given my passion for psychology – I am constantly inundated with ideas, insights and plans for what I want to communicate with others.
I am writing outlines on my phone, conducting research as I find a few extra spare minutes here and there. When you’re passionate about something, the actual action and doing is something that seems to flow with ease. Yes, planning and will power have its time and place. But when you’re working on a goal that excites you, it doesn’t always feel like hard work.
Hard work and will power only takes a person so far in their endeavours. It won’t be enough to pick you up after failure. It won’t motivate you to keep moving forward in the dark. It won’t motivate you to be your personal best. It won’t keep you resilient against other peoples’ criticisms. It’s your dream, vision and personal passion that will be the driving force behind keeping you committed to the accomplishment of your goals.
Whether or not you’re in control of your ‘locus of control’ can mean a lot when it comes to achieving your career goals and achieving life satisfaction in general.
What is ‘locus of control’? It is a personality theory originally developed by Rotter (1954) which states that a person’s place or locus, mental notion, or perception of control is either ‘located’ outside their control or inside their control. The terms external locus of control and internal locus of control were coined to denote these meanings.
Do you feel as though you are in control of your life and your career goals? In other words, do you feel that you can influence the results and outcomes of your life? Are you able to manifest those things in your career and lifestyle that are important to you?
If a person with an external locus of control fails to receive a promotion at work and they blame it on their insensitive boss or too stiff of competition, then they are unlikely to perceive themselves as having a sense of agency and personal power to act on and to control their environment. As a result, their efforts are minimal and their actions to steer their career strategically and proactively are limited.
Likewise, if this same person has an internal locus of control they are unlikely to make such excuses for themselves, and instead they will take 100% responsibility for their situation by strategically problem-solving ways in which they can increase their chances for a promotion in the future, either at their current company or elsewhere.
Do you think you have an internal or external locus of control when it comes to your own life and your career goals?
Just remember, for every single circumstance that you cannot control, there are at least 100 or even an infinite number of other circumstances that you can control.
While there will be events that occur in our lives that set us back in our careers or lives in general, we can still make choices to control our attitudes, choices, actions and so forth. So, instead of focusing on the things that stand in between you and your career goals, decide today that you will focus on your own personal sense of agency, and that you will take action in areas that you can easily move forward with.
Here are three ways to take control of your ‘locus of control’ and to adopt an internal locus of control.
1. Have a vision, purpose and meaning to your life. This means setting goals and intentions for what you want in your life, and creating your own motivation to ensure that you can follow through with your dreams regardless of what barriers you run into. Try my goal setting and motivation program by clicking here.
2. While you might not be able to control a particular situation or circumstance in its entirety, what small pieces might you be able to influence? Dr. Nick Hall in his program called Change Your Beliefs, Change Your Life, suggests that taking some little small action is better than none at all, even if your efforts result in no concrete or visible change.
Pull out a sheet and paper, and brainstorm 10 different ways that you can exert some form of influence or control over your environment or situation, today. What haven’t you tried yet? What might work even if you believe it won’t work? What paths are open for you to run forward in? In what areas are you not being held back from achieving your career goals? Can you take a small step there?
3. Talk to someone who can encourage you and help you adopt a new perspective. Whether it’s a friend, family member, counsellor, coach or consultant, you might need someone who can challenge your belief or way of viewing your situation.
Sometimes by adjusting the lenses through which we perceive our lack of control we can find new meanings and new ways of acting on our career path, which in turn can help us build some momentum. Read more about how to overcome your limiting beliefs here.
How is one supposed to get ready to set their New Year’s goals? Why must one get ready? First of all, we all know from experience that achieving our New Year’s goals and resolutions can be very challenging. Read here to learn more about why New Year’s goals and resolutions are difficult to achieve.
But, before you begin setting your goals and intentions for the New Year, you might really benefit by first taking stock of what you have achieved this year. What accomplishments are you proud of? What needs recognition? Have you acknowledged all the smaller efforts and steps forward that you have taken? If you haven’t taken this step you will benefit from completing a personal improvement review.
Completing a personal improvement review is a rewarding way to gain closure on 2011 and it is an excellent way to help increase your confidence for the New Year. It is also a symbolic way of acknowledging that your accomplishments are important because you are actively investing in yourself and taking the time to grow and develop.
Before you start your New Year’s Resolutions for 2012, be sure to follow my goal setting program which includes seven steps that will drastically increase your chances of not only setting New Year’s goals but also ensuring that you actually follow through with your goals.
Complete the online goal setting program for 2012!
Step 1: Explore what goals and intentions are the most meaningful to you at this point in time. What you wanted to achieve or create last year might not be as important to you this year. Don’t skip this step of brainstroming your goals.
If you haven’t already started an evolving achievement binder and learned how to manage your evolving acheivements binder you’ll want to read further on this because it’s an excellent way to organize your goals for any time of the year.
Step 2: Once you’ve brainstormed your goals take the necessary time to prioritize which goals are the most important and aligned with your current values.
Step 3: Writing your goals down formally and placing them somewhere you can be reminded of them every is important. This will help to keep you focused.
Step 4: Get clear on the benefits that you will reap as a result of achieving these goals. How will your life be better off as a result of moving closer to this accomplishment?
Step 5: Increase your negative motivation and gain clarity on the negative consequencs that you will experience if you don’t work towards achieving your goals.
Step 6: Identify what your limiting beliefs are so that you change them into more constructive ways of thinking.
Step 7: Gain clarity on what behaviours and habits are holding you back so that you can find alternative behaviours that will help propel you into further action with your goals.
If you’re an ambitious individual always striving to improve your life, then it’s likely that you’ve set New Year’s resolutions and used this time of the year as a good opportunity to change aspects of your life, or to set new goals.
This is no surprise because the New Year is symbolic of new beginnings as the calendar year changes. However, you have to ask yourself – what is really different other than the year number moving forward by one? Very little is different. So, why is this such a good time to make changes? I would argue that it’s not always the best time, and that there may be more factors against us than there are supporting us.
The Holidays are a Busy and Stressful Time of The Year
First of all, the holidays are a very busy and overwhelming time for everyone. We are shopping, attending social functions and running many errands. We are travelling to visit family and finishing projects at work.
Seldom does the transition to the New Year leave us much time to focus on ourselves and our personal change efforts or goals. In fact, the New Year may leave many people feeling exhausted, especially if one has over-indulged in rich foods!
By the time everyone rolls back to work in the New Year, our corporations and supervisors have a new set of goals that they want everyone to attend to. This can be stressful in and of itself given that our energy levels may not be at their peak.
New Year’s Resolutions Are Often Too Big
With the New Year, most people’s resolutions are usually something ‘big’, daunting or overwhelming in nature. For instance, so many people (usually women) talk about losing 50 pounds, quitting smoking, switching jobs, or going back to school for further training.
These types of large goals can create a lot of pressure on ourselves to achieve and perform in a certain way, and the expectation is that we begin January 1st and that we hope to be successful. These types of goals and changes however are very scary to our brains.
New Year’s Resolutions Scare Our Brain and Create Fear
Sometimes our New Years resolutions activate the fear/threat system in our brains. This is in part referred to as the fight-flight syndrome, where all the blood in our bodies moves away from our cerebral cortex and into our muscles so that we are poised to run away from our predators. What happens is that we end up avoiding taking our goals seriously because they feel too daunting, or they create too much pressure for us.
Small Steps Can Be Implemented At Any Time Of The Year!
What’s the solution then? Start breaking these New Year’s resolutions into smaller goals and concrete steps that you can begin taking today instead of waiting for the arbitrary New Year. Small steps are something that you can work into your schedule at any time and they are much less intimidating.
Statistically, New Years Resolutions Have Been Shown to Not Be Very Successful
After all, if your goal is so important, then whey would you wait until the New Year to begin it? Another interesting point is that studies indicate that if a person is trying to change a habit, they will set a New Year’s resolution 10 times before they actually succeed! What does this mean? Start your change efforts today, because you are likely going to need some practice at making this change.
With small changes and new habits that we carry out daily, we train and shape the neural pathways in our brains to grow with our new habits and changes that our goals require. Neural pathways begin to support our new behaviours and attitudes and we are more likely to succeed in the long run
Bring in The New Year with New Appreciation for What You Have Accomplished
You might find it helpful to conduct a personal improvement review on yourself, something that you might want to do every quarter of the year, or as often as you desire. In addition, be sure to start and evolving achievements binder where you can capture all the goals that you think about as the New Year approaches. An evolving achievements binder is easy to manage, and it’s an inspiring way to keep yourself on track as the New Year progresses.
Start Setting Your Goals Now for 2012!
If you haven’t tried my goal setting and motivation program yet, be sure to book mark this page and come back to get started