Create Time to do what you Value
Do you create time to do what you value? Do you find yourself waking up most mornings and not looking forward to your day? Do you wakeup and ask yourself, Why do I have to do this today? If you have answered yes to this question, you are like many other people. We live in a world that is full of things we feel we should be doing. Or even worse, we feel that we have no choice and that we have to be doing these things.
We have the power to choose what we want our lives to be filled with. It is critical to remind yourself that all things you are spending your time on are decisions that you chose. No one truly forces you into your unique situation. Whether your decisions occur consciously or as an automatic response to your previous habits, you are still responsible for making your decisions. You are responsible for the rules and beliefs held in your own brain. That is not to say that other people don’t influence your decisions and thoughts, because I will admit that people do influence others’ decisions. What is helpful to remember is that you are ultimately the only one who is in control of your decisions, and you are the one that lives with the consequences of your decisions. Not others.
In my experience, I have always found it helpful to leave open a small portion of time in my schedule to do the things that are important to me. There is nothing worse than waking up in the morning and thinking of all of the things you have to attend to, but sometimes aren’t interested in doing. I love Eddie Cantor’s saying:
What’s the use of running when we are on the wrong road? There’s a big difference between being busy and being fulfilled. Eddie Cantor makes my point clear – Slow down and enjoy life. It’s not only the scenery you miss by going too fast – you also miss the sense of where you are going and why.
The point here is that when you are always busy and tied up to your regular scheduled routines, you have no time to step back, reflect and evaluate what’s actually going on in your life. Sometimes people get so caught up in their regular routines that they miss out on, or forget about the potentially meaningful opportunities in life, and fail to recognize their other talents, desires or callings. When we create a little bit of extra time for ourselves, we honour a space in which we can make more conscious and effective life choices, which consequently empower us and give our lives more vitality.
Decide today that you will not over commit yourself to a schedule that is jammed packed with “shoulds” or activities that you feel pressured to participate in. I think that over-commiting ourselves can be one of our biggest stressor. Decide today that you will not be in such a rush to get to your destination.
There’s a famous quote that says, Life is a journey, not a destination. Slow down and learn how to enjoy life along the way! Realize that you will always be trying to achieve something, finishing a project, putting out a fire, or attempting to make a life transition. Life will always present circumstances to keep you busy, distracted or occupied with important things. Do not be in the habit of putting your passions off until ‘tomorrow’. Ultimately, tomorrow is today!
Perhaps you are already busy with meaningful endeavours, but you never take a break. Be careful to not get stuck in the vicious cycle of achieving one destination and then immediately running for the next. Take time to learn how to enjoy your achievements. Do you work or run a business so that you can ‘get by’ and live, or, do you live to enjoy the process of the beautiful moments of your work? If you are a workaholic now and want to slow down your pace of life, it is possible. It’s not easy, but it is possible. The best way to get started is to take baby steps. You have to understand that overworking and over-committing is a learned habit. We must learn to question why we do the things we do. Are we doing them out of guilt, pressure or prestige? Are we doing it not because we like it, but because we just want the credential for it? Or do we like what we’re doing but we are spending too much time on it?
How do you know if you’ve over-commited to something? The answer is simple. You always find yourself wishing you were somewhere else instead of where you actually are. You wonder why you joined what you joined. You wonder why you are doing it all. Perhaps you did not leave yourself enough time to make a good decision, and instead immediately jumped into something spontaneously.
Be very careful in your decision to commit to something. that will take up a considerable portion of your time. When you are thinking of taking on more work, joining a club, organization or are planning to register for a course, think your decision over carefully in the beginning. Examine your reasoning behind your decision. Is this really what you want to do? Is this activity going to bring you closer to your goals? Will this make you happy? Who’s idea was it for you to engage in this anyways? Was it your own or someone elses idea? A lot of time people make commitments because they think they ought to. They are constantly concerned with peoples’ judgments around them. A person takes on a new project at work thinking about how it will boost her resume, which will land her a higher-paying position within her company. Just thinking about carrying out the tasks makes her feel sluggish and de-energized. One must ask one’s self what alternative, creative options are available that would be a more efficient means of achieving his or her end goal.
Don’t engage or participate in things simply because you think you should. Your passion will never be unleashed because your energy or vibrational level will be too low. Instead, engage yourself into activities that inspire you and would hold you enthusiastic! Many times we find ourselves committing to things for other people’s sakes, and not our own. We do things to make other people happy and forget our own needs and wants.
What will happen if we don’t regularly incorporate this special time into our schedules, whether it be time to pursue our passions and desires, time to reflect and explore new opportunities, time to relax, or just plain and simple quiet time? The answer to that question is that we might develop a sense of unworthiness. When we do not schedule time for ourselves we are unconsciously telling ourselves that we are not worth it. We are not worthy enough to do what we want to do. This will result in low self-esteem and lead us into the cycle of not believing in ourselves. When we don’t believe in ourselves we end up following the mainstream footsteps of society and engage in a way of life that is already designed for us.
There is a saying, Design your life before the circumstances of life design it for you. Let this idea be something you ponder when you make decisions with how you want to spend your time.
Reflective Questions – Create Time to do what you Value:
1. How can I give myself permission to create the time and space needed for self-reflection and/or the pursuit of meaningful endeavours?
2. What do I always wish I could give myself time for?
3. What do I admire about how other people spend their time, and how could I incorporate something similar into my own lifestyle?
4. When I consider the possibilities for how I might use my extra time, which uses of time will I immediately look back on and regret? Which uses of time will I look back on and not regret, but be proud of for giving myself permission to use my time in that way?
5. What limiting beliefs or rules stand in my way of giving myself permission to spend more time doing what I value?
6. If my morals stand in my way, how can I be moral and still give myself the time that I need?
7. Am I worried about what others might think regarding how I want to spend my time? If so, how can I overcome other peoples’ judgments regarding the way(s) that I desire to use my time?
8. What excuses, reasons or justifications do I use to prevent myself from having time to focus on what is important to me? Although these reasons are all ‘valid’, you must realize that they still prevent you from being able to spend your time in your own personal way.
9. In what ways do I conform to social norms when it comes to how I spend my time? Which of these are truly necessary?
10. How will I raise my standards when it comes to freeing up more time?
11. What things do I want to enjoy and have time for in my life, but am avoiding taking responsibility for?
12. In terms of how I spend my time, which habits in my life have I absolutely got to get rid of?
13. Which patterns of my time use drain my energy?
14. What is out of balance with respect to how I spend my time?
15. Which decisions have I been putting off regarding how I am spending my time?
16. How does thinking in ‘black or white’ or ‘all or nothing’ prevent me from taking time out for myself?
17. How do I want to design my life?
18. What could I do or focus on during this extra time that would give me momentum and a forward moving feeling in life?
19. What things or activities am I currently pursuing or participating in that I don’t feel good about?
20. Are there any particular people whom I constantly give my time away to, or spend too much time with when I don’t want to?
21. How can I raise my standards or expectations about how I use my time?
22. If I can give myself this needed time, how will this produce a positive domino-effect on the other areas of my life?
23. Who will I be a great role model to, if I start using my time in this purposeful way?
24. Who will admire me for what I accomplish or do with this time?
25. How might valuing my time in this particular way change my life forever, in a positive way?
Goal setting and Time Management
Goal setting and time management – who doesn’t want to become more efficient in these pursuits?
Let’s face it, – it’s something that we all struggle with!
Each of us has weaknesses and strengths in regards to achieving the many different areas of goals in our lives:
- Health Goals
- Financial Goals
- Career Goals
- Education and Personal Development Goals
- Relationship and Leisure Goals
Which areas of goal setting and time management do you struggle with? Have you tried to get your life together so many times before in the past, but you’ve just never gotten yourself to really focus on the needed tasks?
Do you ever secretly pray and wish that you could find a way to motivate yourself into action? Do you wish you could get yourself together?
Well you’ve come to the right place, because I am all about helping people find ways to motivate themselves into action. Motivation is one of the most mysterious human dilemmas that I am super passionate about.
Are you ready to experience another one of my “Ah-ha!” moments? What I’m about to share with you has dramatically changed my life. I call it the power of comparions.
When it comes to leveraging your success with goal setting and time management, one of my super successful strategies that I’ve used on myself and with my clients, is the power of comparisons. The best way to explain this is for me to demonstrate a personal example in the area of health.
First let me ask you – Do you constantly struggle with getting the motivation to exercise? Do you wish you had the workout motivation that would allow you to feel like a million bucks? Perhaps you feel like there just isn’t enough time?
Or, maybe you technically have the time, but you find yourself with conflicting values. Part of you wants to exercise, while part of you wants to sit in front of the television and veg. Hmmm…Sound familiar?
Now, here is where the power of comparisons come in for increasing your motivation with goal setting and time management. Are you ready for a personal breakthrough?!
Motivate Yourself Using The Power of Comparisons!
Here is how you need to think when it comes to motivating yourself. First of all, exercising and working out is obviously something you value, or at least something that you want to value. So, compare then, all the time spent in your life, where you are engaging in activities that you don’t actually value. What activities do you engage in simply because you feel obliged to engage in?
The here, is asking yourself the following question: If I spend amount of time doing something that I don’t really care all that much about, then when wouldn’t I spend that same amount of time exercising? Why wouldn’t I give myself the gift of spending my time working out?
Here are some powerful comparisons that have been really transformational for me that have revitalized my goal setting and time management techniques as they relate to my health.
Keep reading because one of these comparisons might change your life too! Don’t you just love those “ah-ha!” moments?! Ok, ok…back on track to my personal example…
Here are a few of the comparisons I say out aloud to myself when I need to motivate myself:
If I used to get up at 6am, three times a week to attend a research and statistics class that I hated, then why wouldn’t I get myself up at 6am these days so that I could give myself the gift of a great workout?
In other words, if I’ve been willing to spend and invest my time in an activity (boring class), that I didn’t enjoy or care about all that much,and in a particular manner that I wasn’t fussy about (early morning), – than why wouldn’t I get myself to apply this same amount of self-discipline to a goal that truly does matter to me?
If I used to get myself up at 6am to drag myself to a class I cared nothing about, than why do I not demand of myself to be up at 6am to fit my exercise into my day? Do you see the comparison here?
I am comparing how I’ll easily invest time into others’ expectations of myself, but then I won’t hold myself to the same rigorous standards when it comes to my own exercise goals. It is a bizarre, yet liberating way to think about things.
So, when it comes to your goal setting and time management techniques – remember to think outside of the box! Use the power of comparisons! Compare how you are already spending time on things you don’t value, yet you are not spending time on what you do value – exercising for example.
The “ah-ha!” here, is – if I’m willing to spend time doing things I don’t value, like, or care that much about, then why wouldn’t I spend at least the same amount of time doing something that is truly important to me!??
Stay tuned as I develop my website! I will be adding many more examples on my website – examples that will create many more powerful realizations for you – whether you want to improve your goal setting and time management techniques as it relates to your health, wealth or your personal relationships – you will find the motivation here!
[tags] goal setting and time management, time management [/tags]